A great metaphor

I'm reading The Hanged Man's Song, by John Sandford. So far it's better than Digital Fortress, though maybe not as ambitious. For some reason this metaphor really jumps out at me:

The night was as dark as Elvis velvet...

I don't know why I like that so much, but I do.

Sounds like a new TLC show

According to this story, a woman in Douglasville, Georgia broke into a home while the owner was away on vacation for two and a half weeks and moved in with her dog. She repainted, redecorated, replaced some carpet, and installed a new washer and dryer.

Why can't this happen to me? I'd settle for someone mowing the lawn and fixing the dangling brass number on my mailbox. I'd only have to be gone for a few hours. Maybe they will come on a Sunday and put the newspaper back together.

Anyway, the intruder was charged with burglary, although I'm not sure exactly what it was that she burgled.

And now from the literary world...

The Da Vinci Code was the hottest book of the new century, and guess what...I haven't read it. But I did just finish a prior book by Dan Brown, Digital Fortess. Apparently, Mr. Brown drastically improved his writing skills between the two books, because Digital Fortress was a piece of crap. I haven't seen such a naive (and totally inaccurate) treatment of technology since Hackers and The Net. I could have overlooked the technical problems if the story hadn't been so predictable. The main character had an IQ of 170, and yet somehow I consistently figured out what was going on about 50 pages before she did. I wish I could get that time back. I could have been watching America's Next Top Model instead.

Doesn't everything?

I read in Men's Health that home tooth whitening kits cause oral cancer. Good thing my metrosexual phase never really developed any traction.

(OK, so I moisturize! Nobody likes crow's feet.)

GO SOX!

Man, Curt Schilling's got more guts in his little finger than I've got in my whole head.

Uh...you know what I mean.

Cold feet

I haven't yet decided if having a blog is cool or just pathetic. Sorta like singing karaoke, oddly enough.

Here we go!

I've really been pressuring myself over what this first post should be about...I guess it will set the tone for my blog. Hmmm...something profound...something meaningful...

Nuthin.

I'm such a loser. I just found out that one of my former co-workers once again won an award in the prestigious annual Obfuscated C programming contest (he always has things to talk about in his blog, since he and his wife have spent the last year and a half in Asia and Australia...but I'm not bitter...). My office mate, who is ten years younger than me, was just interviewed by Slashdot a couple of weeks ago. My friend Mads (who went to MIT) has a blog where he discusses American politics with just enough insight to make me feel inadequate. He's not even American for Pete's sake!

I just want my 15 minutes! Is that too much to ask?